When Radishes Take Over
by Astra Guardian
Summary: Evil Oddishes have come from the sky to take over the Poke-world. Now, a group of friends has united to help put a stop to this menace. But what's more of a threat? The Oddishes, or the chaos the friends will cause? Crack fic.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a crack fic. If you want a serious read, look elsewhere. :P Seriously, if you can't handle evil Oddishes, crazy Oshawotts, puzzle loving Zigzagoons, Oddish-hating Gravelers, or any of the totally awesome characters in this story, DON'T READ IT.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, or most of the characters. (Character ownership will be put at the end) **

**Warning: Contains nuts.**

The Oshawott paced back and forth in her house, from the cave opening to the gaps that allowed a view of the crystal clear Undella Bay. The otter couldn't appreciate the water at the moment though, as she her brain was busy attempting to reassure her. _He forgot; that's all. Any second now, he'll remember, and he'll be here. Oh, who am I kidding? He didn't forget. Something bad happened. This is all my fault… _

The Oshawott was interrupted from her thoughts by a voice. "Blaze, you dropped your hat."

Blaze sighed and grabbed the party hat off the floor, securing it on one of her cone-shaped ears. "Thanks, I didn't realize… Giga, I hope Tails comes soon. He's almost an hour late…"

Giga frowned as he glanced towards the door. "Any second now, Pwnage will be here. Try to relax; a stressed party host isn't exactly very welcoming." The Graveler stuck out his tongue.

Blaze rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to reply, buy quickly closed it. She turned towards the door, from where a feeble knocking sound could be heard. The Oshawott grinned and turned to her friends. "Quick, hide!"

As the guests ducked behind the curtains that separated the cave from the cottage, the sea otter pokemon opened the door. "Hey Tails, good to-" The otter suddenly stopped, and let out a bloodcurdling shriek.

A Venonat by the name of Meph stepped out from behind the curtains and gasped as he saw the reason for Blaze's shriek.

Something bad _had _happened to the Zigzagoon. His fur was matted with blood, he struggled to stand, and his eyes were wide with terror.

A lightbulb went off in Meph's head and he quickly shouted out his idea. "Someone get me some oran berry cake!"

Tails winced as he struggled to talk. "I don't think now is the time to eat."

Giga ran up to the three pokemon, holding a piece of cake in each hand. "I have to agree with Pwnage. What's with the oran berry cake? Wait, oran berry! Of course!" Giga quickly stuffed some cake into Tails's mouth.

Blaze blinked in confusion. "Wah?"

A Leafeon stepped up to explain as Tails began noming the cake. "Oran berry cake. The oran berries still have their healing properties."

The Oshawott paused and nodded. "I'm such an idiot. Thanks Annette. So, Tails, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?"

The Zigzagoon continued to nom the cake as the Oshawott started to rant. "Bandits, thieves, attempted murderers, or perhaps the pizza guy? What happened to you? You were late for your own party. It's sad and cruel to hurt someone on their birthday. It's disgusting! WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?"

The Oshawott was about to continue ranting and probably annoy everyone around her to the death, but was interrupted by a loud boom of thunder.

Tails' eyes grew wide, and he let out a whimper. "They're coming, they're coming. They're coming!" He began to sob.

Giga paused, startled by Tails' action. "I believe Tails is scarred, though I don't quite get how the storm is related. Perhaps it was an electric type pokemon that put him in this state? Still, I've got this thought in the back of my head. It's important, I think. There's a problem we're not addressing…"

The group was startled by a loud pounding at the door.

Blaze leapt into the air, terrified. "It's the coppas! I'm not here! And if I am, I'm innocent! Just an adorable little Oshawott. I didn't do anything!" The Oshawott glanced around, and hide under a table.

Ignoring the Oshawott, Meph pulled open the door to reveal a Blastoise standing outside. "Oh, hey Chris."

The Oshawott sighed in relief that the cops weren't coming to take her away.

Chris turned to Tails. "You're another year older! You're so old now! I hope you had a great birthday." He turned to face the whole group. "Anyone know Oddishes were flying type?"

The group was confused, but followed the Blastoise outside.

What words could be used to describe the scene they found? Well, I'd have to say astounding, horrifying, and unbelievable. It hides in the pokemon's nightmares, reminding them of it all…

What? What do you mean 'Go back to the story, or else'? This story isn't called 'Or else'. It's called When Radishes Take Over! … Oh, I see what you mean… Right, back to the story…

Lightning flashed in the sky, thunder rumbled, and Oddishes fell from the sky. Hundreds of Oddishes could be seen, floating down, wearing little parachutes. They landed and laughed, an evil smile forming on their small faces.

Thousands of Oddishes could be seen on the rocky cliffs. It was unforgettable.

Giga stepped forward, glaring at the little Oddishes. "I HATE ODDISHES!"

Let the fun begin!

**Character ownership:**

**Blaze the Oshawott belongs to me.**

**Giga the Graveler belongs to Gigaremo.**

**Meph the Venonat belongs to Mephilles2.**

**Tails the Zigzagoon belongs to tails-is-pwnage.**

**Annette the Leafeon belongs to TJloveshisMidna.**

**Chris the Blastoise belongs to ChrisMSMB.**

**Stay tuned for the next chapter of When Radishes Take Over…**

**What will happen to the Poke-world now that evil Oddishes are coming from the sky to take over? How will this affect everyone? Will we meet more characters? What's with these Oddishes? How are they falling from the sky? What is their goal? Will the chaos be stopped, or will more begin? Why am I asking all of these questions? Find out, next chapter!**

**Oh, and if you review, you get a free dead Oddish! So, review and get your own dead Oddish while supplies last! *Stabbed for having infinite supplies***


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, or most of the OCs. OC ownership will be put at the end. Oh, and I don't own Shakira. XD**

**Warning: IT STILL CONTAINS NUTS! :D And it's cracked. **

The Oddishes snickered as they glanced around at their comrades. They all opened their mouths and a variety of voices spoke in unison. "This is a warning. We're coming, and there's nothing you can do. You fight against us; you die. You surrender without a fight of any sorts; you still die! You breathe; you die! There's no escaping us; we will take your life. You'll all perish as the rightful leaders take over. Here's a hint; they ain't any of you! Fear thy name of the Oddish family. FEAR IT! This message has been paid for by the O.D.D.I.S.H. society; Orange Dread Dances In Shiny Harpoons."

_O_o; Really? Orange Dread Dances In Shiny Harpoons? That's just lame… *Strangled* Right, the story…_

A flash of light came, forcing Pokemon all over the globe to cover their eyes to not lose sight. Unfortunately, a stupid Swoobat decided to "not go along with the crowd" and keep its eyes open. It was blinded by the flash and fell out of the air, onto the ground, where a monster truck ran over it.

_Wait… How can Pokemon drive trucks? Where did they get trucks from? What makes these trucks so… "monstrous"? Eh, this is a crack fic…_

When the light vanished, all over, the Oddishes had vanished without a trace.

_They vanished less mysteriously than they appeared? LAME ODDISHES. LAME…._

**Later, in Hoenn…**

A male Swampert stood alone in a meeting room. He was perched on top of the official looking ovular black table, dancing like there was no tomorrow, and with moves as weird as his, for anyone who happened to see this, they might not want to live to see tomorrow.

He was singing, his words coming out at a cross between screaming and howling. "OH, MY HIPS DON'T LIE, YOU GOT THAT RIGHT!" His hips swung back and forth, completely out of sync with the beat. "MY HIPS WON'T LIE, CAUSE THEY DON'T LIE! YOU CAN TRUST MY HIPS! MY HIPS DON'T LIE!"

An Audino poked his head through the door leading to the meeting room, and instantly regretted it. "Um, sir?" The Swampert didn't hear the Audino's surprisingly deep voice and continued his bad dancing. "Um, SIR!" The Swampert froze like a deer in headlights. "We have to do something about these Oddish."

The Swampert pouted, "Why?"

The Audino rolled his eyes, "We're the army, navy, and basically every military function that exists. In situations of crisis, we're in charge. So, therefore, we need a plan. A good one."

The Swampert paused, pondering several ideas before replying. "Send in Team Alpha."

"Hunting down terrorists, so I'm afraid that won't be possible."

"Team Beta?"

"Ilex Forest fires." The Audino sighed, wondering how long the conversation would last.

"Team Sword?"

"They're missing, sir." The Audino began to play with his ears.

The Swampert frowned. "Oh, right… How about Team Wish?"

"Fighting Mewtwo." The Audino began shifting his feet, becoming impatient.

"Team Team?" The Swampert questioned hopefully.

"We don't have such a team, sir."

The Swampert groaned. "Fine, send in Bows."

The Audino rolled his eyes. "Bows is visiting some friends, remember? We don't know when he'll get back."

The Swampert sighed, "Tabsunne, get _**her**_..."

Tabsunne's eyes flew upward in shock. "General Fin, remember last time? There was more chaos than the solution was worth!"

General Fin glared down at the Audino. "NOW."

::::

Tabsunne scurried away, and several minutes later, a Skitty trotted down the black carpet and up to the General.

A smug grin formed on the Skitty's face. "So, Shakira, you called?"

The Swampert took a step back in surprise, and clumsily fell off the meeting table. He struggled to get up, and when he did, a bright red blush was on his face. "H-how do you know about that?" He quickly questioned.

The smug grin remained on the Skitty's face. "Do you really think I'm going to answer that question? Maybe I could answer it in a pony reaction video… So, I'm going to kick some Oddish butt? WILL DO!

::::

The Skitty happily trotted out of the base, and out into the meadows surrounding it. Her eyes were closed as she skipped through the flowers, anxious to start the violent killing spree.

"_Liza…"_

Letting out a growl and puffing out her tail, Liza quickly glanced around, spotting a Vileplume and Bellossom. She grinned. "I've been itching to inflict pain on others all day!" She sprang forward, becoming a pastel pink and cream colored blur.

Liza rammed into the Vileplume at a high speed barely wincing, while the Vileplume toppled over onto the ground, moaning in pain.

The Skitty quickly slapped the Bellossom once with her tail, catching the Grass type pokemon off guard. However, as she attempted to repeat this, the Bellossom grabbed Liza's tail and gave a yank. Liza let out a howl of pain, but continued to struggle, attempting to escape the Bellossom's grip.

The Bellossom quickly attacked with Sleep Powder, trapping the Skitty in a cloud of powder. The Skitty began to yawn, and struggled to stand. Finally, she toppled over, stuck in the land of dreams.

**In Unova…**

The Raichu twitched in his sleep, his face displaying discomfort. "No… No… No… Please, don't put onions on my spam ham… I beg you… I SAID, "PLEASE DON'T PUT ONIONS ON MY SPAM HAM." I USED PLEASE. SO TAKE THE STUPID ONIONS OFF RIGHT NOW." He started throwing punches into the air. "Take this! And that! This'll teach you not to put onions on my spam ham! FEAR ME! FEAR ME!"

"Oh, little Raichu, wake up. Humphrey, you need to wake up. The time for sleeping is over."

The Raichu, aka Humphrey, groaned. "Sis, gimme five minutes. Or an hour. An hour is preferred." He shifted slightly before attempting to dream again.

"I'M NOT YOUR SISTER. WAKE UP, BEFORE I HAVE TO KILL YOU."

Humphrey frowned, not bothering to open his eyes. "You heard me."

"IF I WAS YOUR SISTER, I WOULD'VE DISOWNED YOU."

"That's not very nice…"

"I was just kidding."

"And so was I!" The Raichu released a Thunderbolt.

It hit the Oshawott square in the forehead, and she toppled over. Laying on the floor twitching, she muttered a single word. "Shocking."

**Blaze the Oshawott, General Fin the Swampert, and Tabsunne the Audino belong to me.**

**Giga the Graveler belongs to Gigaremo.**

**Meph the Venonat belongs to Mephilles2.**

**Tails the Zigzagoon belongs to tails-is-pwnage.**

**Annette the Leafeon belongs to TJloveshisMidna.**

**Chris the Blastoise belongs to ChrisMSMB.**

**Liza the Skitty belongs to Marioliza.**

**Humphrey the Raichu belongs to MariYoshBowsFan.**


End file.
